Skylar.
Jam 1 dini hari tanggal 17 Mei 2018 ada tendangan kenceng banget di perut setelah Eqi peluk perut yang berisi anaknya. Karena berasa aneh, aku cek dan ternyata ada flek merah. Okay, mencoba tidak panik karena sakitnya juga belum parah, aku dan Eqi ngambil prepared bag kami dan ngajak mama untuk ke RS.
Sampe RS jam 2 pagi, pas cek pembukaan baru pembukaan 2. Meaning masih lama nih, apalagi kelahiran pertama, pasti masih lama. Mulesnya berangsur makin kuat tapi pembukaan mentok di 4 sampe sore hari. Berbagai upaya dilakukan dari jalan kaki, jongkok, berbaring untuk memancing bukaan, tetep belum ada perkembangan. Sore hari menjelang malam, Obgyn kesayangan kita semua, Dr Soedibjo Toeloes, merekomendasikan tindakan cesar karena mulesnya sudah parah tapi belum ada pembukaan. Perdebatan dimulai antar bumil dan mamanya. Bumil mulai pertimbangan cesar, tapi mama insist normal aja, toh belum pecah ketuban. Kata mama "sabar, rasakan dengan nikmat, itu yang namanya melahirkan memang gitu". Jadilah tangisan menahan sakit ditambah menahan sedih karena mama selalu wrong wording and tone kalo mau nasehatin anaknya.
Jam 12 malam, mules makin hebat dan dokter pengganti karena Obgyn kesayangan kita semua tidak sanggup tindakan malam. Obgyn pengganti namanya dr Zaenuri, and he is very old. Like believe me he is so old that I was full of doubt if he can actually help me. But he did. I pushed like dozen times but the baby went in again. It went out a bit, then back in. So forth until I kicked the Doctor's waist so hard, and still won't come out. They finally made a call to use a vacuum machine, I almost gave up. BUT MIRACLE HAPPENED. I pushed one more time while waiting for the machine to come, and....
jam 00:45, lahirlah sesosok mungil tanpa nangis karena ternyata sudah nelen sebagian air ketuban. Skylar.
Seusai dibersihkan, Skylar didekatkan aku untuk aku cium, lalu diambil lagi untuk disedot ketuban dalam mulut dan tenggorokannya karena tadi belum usai. Selebihnya, I passed out. I think I remember beberapa jahitan tapi kemudian ya pingsan aja ngga inget apa-apa.
I woke up in my ward, with my mother and my husband next to me. Everything was surreal, tiring, satisfying and of course until today, it's challenging. This was almost 3 years ago, and the pain is still mesmerising.
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| The first time Sky met her baby brother - 5 June 2019 |
Karim.
Karim was the easiest during pregnancy, I took him to so many places with so many transport modes; bus, train, motorbike. All went well. During my second pregnancy, Eqi was so much more mature and supportive. I enjoyed having Karim so much because it was easy. So easy that I literally only went to check up 4 times, then I changed into a cheaper Doctor, Prof Ali Baziad. He was so fun and kind, old but smart, which is nice. I only met him twice before labor but we had that connection.
4 June 2019, 3 PM and Eqi had his day off from the gym to break fasting (yes it was Ramadan) at home with me. Perkiraan dari awal memang lahiran antara 1 sampai 10 Juni. So between those dates he managed to go back and forth more often rather than staying at the gym on weekdays and go home on weekend only. I still played with Sky until at 3 PM I felt a bit of contraction and another mucus. So I asked Eqi to go check to the nearest doula. She checked and it was only 2 cm dilated. Baru pembukaan dua mah masih lama lah ya, berpatokan pada anak pertama.
We continued chatting cooking and playing until Magrib time, I prepared break fast for Eqi. I made myself indomie, until isya I finally decided to as Eqi to the hospital. Setelah solat, aku titipin Sky ke mama dengan berbagai pengertian bahwa "ibu mau lahirin Karim dulu ya, Sky jangan nakal sama mama" and that was the first time I left Sky overnight. She was so brilliant, smart and lovely.
We arrived at the hospital at around 9ish PM, and after admitted the data and check this and that, the doula said it's been 4cm dilated. Kondisi bayi oke dilihat dari monitor jantung CTG, tekanan darah ibu juga normal. Jam 10 malem, sakitnya makin nggak nyaman, pembukaan cuma naik dikit ke 5. Setiap jam, mules dan kontraksi makin kuat, Eqi non stop ngelus-ngelus punggung, pinggang, pegang tangan, dan ngasih minum ke aku.
Aku coba tidur, Eqi juga tidur di sampingku. Setiap 15 menit aku kesakitan, aku remes tangan Eqi sampe dia bangun trus dia elus-elus lagi. Sekitar jam 11 lewat, mama dateng. Aku kaget, karena dia ninggalin Sky sama tetangga kami (yang bisa dipercaya sih memang). Mama nunggu di luar, Rio juga dateng. Agak lega karena banyak yang nunggu di luar, dan Eqi di samping.
Jam 12an, Prof Ali dikabarkan on the way ke rumah sakit, karena pembukaan sudah di 8. Sakitnya bertubi-tubi dan aku cuma bisa zikir, berdoa, nahan sakit, minta peluk Eqi. Jam 1 malam Prof Ali datang, dan pas pembukaan sudah ke 10. Aku inget banget, jernih ingetanku, suster dan asisten RS bersiap dengan semua peralatan. Kakiku diminta ditekuk dan Prof mulai suruh aku dorong.
Kerasa banget air ketuban pecah dan cairan membasahi paha sampai bokongku. I wasn't sure if it was ketuban or blood, but it's just wet and very painful. I pushed, took a breath, pushed, took a breath, for a couple of times. Eqi was holding my hand from beside and kept on kissing my forehead saying "ayo kamu bisa, dorong yah... bagus, nah iya, tarik nafas, dorong lagi... ayo bentar lagi kok.." and so on. He held my hand full of love yet I could feel he's nervous too. He kissed me so many times to make sure that I am sober and strong enough to keep on pushing.
Not as long and as hard when I was with Sky, Karim came out smoother but more painful on the legs. He came out nicely and when the Doctor announced "laki laki ya bu" I felt so relieved, Eqi kissed my forehead saying "good job bu" and he performed azan to Karim. I asked for Karim to be latched to my breast and he sucked VERY GOOD. I was so relieved, so happy, so accomplished, at the same time so guilty to Sky that I had to share the love.
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Two babies in 3 years in a row. I surprised myself of how much I actually am capable of. Since then, I have never felt anything more painful to my physical condition than going into labour.