tulisan hampa

these days, i learn that no matter how painful the effort is for a cook to serve the meal, guests will just score what they taste in their mouth, and what they see in their plate.

i am so bad at allocating my time in doing tasks. those who think i am an excellence and hardworker are totally wrong. only fifteen minutes out of thirty i spent my time focused on the tasks in the pc screen, the rest: blogging, facebooking, twittering. i know i am one of those new media victims, but who can deny that these technologies aren't tempting? simply altruism. i am so bad at focusing in one specific thing, i am a terrible multi-tasker who does not have one specific skill to be serioused at. (i know serioused is not a word). i am bad at writing, and that is ironic as i have written hundreds of posts in blogs yet gained below merit for my written assignments in school. pathetic writer who has no structure and sense of writing. me. i resolute myself for an impending objective. i don't even know what 'impending' means, but i keep hating myself more for not even knowing what myself is. complicated.

I'd simply say this to my passport, held by the custom because of the unfinished business about my visa. I really am curious about how such a multinational company failed to handle all the permit matters to get me here. I wasn't supposed to be the one who has to go around and all over the place to take care of this shitty problem. They were the one who called me to handle the crisis. And me, yes, as a public speaker, a PR expert and a media handler, I should be the one who enjoyed my white wine inside a limo, going around and being a fool in the casino. but no, I woke up unintentionally in the custom office and had to attend another session of interview with the border officer. They have been holding me since yesterday. I was like "dude! 24 hours means I have the right to get myself a lawyer!" but they seemed don't care. Yet, here I am, in a small canteen, having a sip of coffee before having another stupid interrogation about my intention of going here. Th...

We inhabit a world where we are judged solely by results (Millar and others, 2010). I strongly disagree dude, I don't have to have other reference, I just disagree. To go to the results, you go through many process and way, and that is subjectively relative to what extent is the result you are going to judge. I'm kind of stuck. Having lots of things to think of, some things to do, few things I have done. today is the most unproductive day I thought, but then I wrote this post. I don't know who to talked to aside from God. The pain that you don't see, I don't show, doesn't mean vanished in time. I just chose to left it unspoken, and some business are really not yours. I am sick of losers, sometimes of myself. I missed being 'home' doing nothing and thinking of nothing as well. I disjuncture my mind with the readings materials I have to go through, I neglect myself the importance of deadlines, and I ignore the fact that any sign...

I know that 'lowlessness' is not even a word, but who cares. eh, no, I should start to care, someone (or many of them) has been checking out my blog recently. Like seriously, I should be thankful for the stats counter of blogger.com. LOL. So, this year, two starter days were fantastic. I spent the time with friends, eight of us. Only one is in a relationship, only one has no ID, and only one who's being ditched. It was a deadly fun trip. We started the day heedlessly by knowing that the two cars we were supposed to rent were no longer available. It ends with one car (instead of two) for 8 of us, can you imagine that? 7 seater for 8 people. two guys are 'big' and we really had to fit ourselves in that tiny vehicle. God bless Ford! DAY (or night?) 1 - 31 Dec 2011 We cruised to Edinburgh, arrived at 18 local time and treated ourselves with Indian food together with other Indonesian friends. Not really good food, but yeah, good time though. We exchange the ticke...