one step at a time

"What? What if it were his girlfriend? Would you do the same?" Gua shock sekali denger Andrea ngucapin belasungkawa ke mantan cowoknya yang baru ditinggal adiknya meninggal karena kecelakaan. Andrea memang agak labil, gua udah sering ingetin untuk ga usah masuk-masuk lagi ke kehidupan laki-laki yang udah merusak hidupnya. Andrea diam, tiba-tiba Bella lewat. Gua tarik tangannya dan dia agak tersentak.

"I wanna break up with you" tanpa basa basi gua sapa dia
"What? Why?" Andrea melihat kiri-kanannya memastikan suara gua nggak terlalu keras
"You disrespect me" tiga kata simpel yang mewakili semua rasa geram gua
"Wow! What?"
"You don't have to be my girlfriend to get me help you, you know that"
"What are you talking about Rick?"
"Last week, you took my swimming kit and didn't give it back, or at least let me know you've used it"
"I thought we've talked about this"
"Yesterday, you got my safety gear and left me on the right side of the broken wing" otak gua memutar kembali simulasi terbang kemarin sore di atas barrack komando.
"I apologised for that, Rick"
"No, let's just break up. You disrespect me. You call me when you need me, you whine and you moan. The minutes after, you didn't even notice me in the backyard's training. Do I have to put a 'your boyfriend' label on my forehead each time I see you?"
"Rick, I slipped into your dorm that night, you haven't over it, though"
"Yea, you can sleep with anyone you like and act like nothing happen, but not with your boyfriend. You act like you don't even know me" gua liat keningnya berkerut agak kesal
"Rick, I'm not a PDA property. If you want me to cuddle around with you in public, you're just wrong"
"I'm not talking about that, you know what I mean, at least take a look at me when you shoot a bullet thru my head" gua mengingatkan lagi ke dia tentang pesta pengangkatan ayahnya jadi jendral di batalyon kami.
"I was hanging around with so many people and friends, what did you expect from me? Talking to you all night long and ignore the guests? Come on Rick"
"Bella, this is ridiculous. You can't always find an excuse to abandon me."
"No, Rick, you're ridiculous"
"Yeah, let's break up, let's be just friends"

Gua berpaling berbarengan dengan suara peluit dari lapangan bawah memanggil kami untuk apel siang. Gua lari dari kantin menyiapkan diri untuk pelatihan militer selanjutnya. Ujian fisik dan mental yang jauh lebih ringan daripada beban hati dan sosial dari perempuan seperti Bella.